Organized? Who me?

I wrote this a year ago, but someone said it to me again yesterday so I have to laugh again and revisit the subject.

There are two things that people say to me often that make me laugh. The first, when they find out that we homeschool, is, "You must be so patient!" The second is, "You must be so organized." Now that my kids are older they laugh, too.

So, to set the record straight, I am neither patient nor organized. I am an impatient--often crabby--messy with ADD. And for some unknown reason I seem to gravitate toward things that require some amount of organization. I scrapbook. I do genealogical research. I have a home business. And, yes, I homeschool.

Last year I recognized that I was SO disorganized that I wasn't accomplishing anything. I knew that I needed some form of organization but didn't know what to do, so I hired a professional organizer. Emily came and helped me tame my paper demons and organize my office. We set up systems for me so that at least things have a place and the visual clutter that distracts me is minimized.

I'm stil not organized, but at least my space and some of my stuff *is.* And even though I would suppose that some of the things we did are common sense to an organized person, I would never have come up with them myself.

I'm going to have Emily back as soon as finances allow to help me get my scrabooking supplies organized. But in the meantime I've found the tips I gleaned from working on my office useful.

Follow up, one year later: Some of the systems are still in place, but man, is my office a mess! I need to get the organizing hints back out and get some things back under control!

Selfish?

My friend Susan has an excellent three-part post that started on Saturday titled Is It Selfish to Fight for Homeschooling Freedoms? She makes some great points.

Dr. Phil on homeschooling

Word went out a while back that Dr. Phil was doing a show on homeschooling and that it was going to be a hit piece. Apparently that piece is going to air Friday, and from the preview on the website it doesn't look pretty.

If you're curious look under Next Week on Dr. Phil and click on Friday.


I don't like Dr. Phil, but I'll probably watch it next Friday so that I can see what he says.

Gimme types vs. cooperation

I had a comment on my last post that really deserves a post of its own in response. I see a definite difference between what the commenter is talking about and the "gimme" types and I want to clarify.

Beth states that in Illinois homeschoolers can join in individual classes at the local schools if they are not full, and that her child has taken several classes in this way and that she has developed a good relationship with the school. That is great! I'm all for that kind of cooperation if it works well for your family.

In Indiana it is up to each school to determine what calsses homeschoolers can take.The reason we haven't pursued such an arrangement is that our needs haven't been of the academic sort--or we have instead gone the route of taking college classes-- but I have known people for whom it has worked nicely. One of our younger sons has been invited to take part in music activities at a local school and has done so.

Beth says:

I'm not quite sure why you call homeschoolers who feel that their kids could benefit from these things 'gimme types'. Homeschooling is not just about keeping the kids away from public school, but doing what is best for each individual kid.

As Beth says, homeschooling is about doing what is best for each child. The kind of arrangements that she is talking about aren't the things that we're seeing people asking for that I call the "gimmes." Just a couple of concrete examples are in order:

Recently we have had discussion on the IndianaHomeschoolers email list about homeschoolers getting money from the state since we don't use the schools. The suggestion was that they give us a debit card to use for educational materials. When it was pointed out that this might mean some oversight of homeschooling or some definition in Indiana code of what we do, there were a few people who felt that it would be worth it to sacrifice homeschool freedoms for the money. (And I think that these people forget that the childless and older people don't use the schools either and still pay. The abolition of universal mandatory funding for schools is a different issue.)

Another suggestion was that the state should pay for our kids to take achievement tests. When it was pointed out that the state might then ask for some kind of accountability or begin to require testing, that was okay with them. They didn't care if other homeschoolers didn't want testing; they just wanted someone else to pay for theirs.

Then there's the issue of sports. High schools sports eligibility in Indiana is decided by the IHSAA. Member schools must abide by the rules in order to participate. One of these rules is an enrollment and attendance rule. There are parents who think that they should be able to opt out of the public schools, but that their child should get to play on athletic teams anyway. These enrollment and attendance rules protect against all sorts of abuses in competetive high school sports. Any exceptions for homeschoolers would open a huge can of worms for the IHSAA and the backlash against homeschoolers would be huge.

There are choices we make when we decide to homeschool. There are a tremendous number of benefits that we realize from homeschooling our children. But there are also opportunities we give up. Even schooled children have trade-offs and choices. If you don't join the French Club, you can't take the club trip to France. If you want to be in a top marching band you give up a good portion of your summer freedom. When we chose to homeschool through high school our daughter gave up the opportunity to play varsity soccer, but for us the trade-off was worth it.

We can't always have everything our way. And I still have a problem with homeschoolers who want to pursue gain for themselves at the cost of homeschool freedoms for everyone else.

A new breed?

A post that I read at Mom is Right has gotten me thinking about something that has really been bugging me lately. There seems to be a growing group among homeschoolers who have the gimmes.

Most of the homeschoolers that we have known over the years--numbering in the hundreds, if not thousands, of families--have just wanted to be left alone to educate their children in the way that is best for them. They've banded together with other homeschoolers to create opportunities for group activities and support. They have understood that in leaving school behind they were potentially giving up some benefits.

The new breed that we're seeing likes the idea of homeschooling, but they often want help. Many of them think that they should get money back because they aren't using the schools. Some think that although they have opted out of having the schools teach their children they should be able to take part in the activities that they choose like sports or music groups.

And they don't care if this isn't the best thing for homeschoolers. They don't care if it brings more regulation. They don't care if hard-won freedoms are lost. They just want what they want.

Sometimes we all have to make tough choices. The choice to continue homeschooling through high school has meant fewer opportunities for our oldest son. In an ideal world sports wouldn't be tied to school, but they are, and it's a choice we made. My son having the opportunity to play high school sports--and he is good enough--is not worth chancing a loss of freedom for other Hoosier homeschoolers.

We could all use a little more money. But if it comes at the cost of testing and curriculum requirements then we've lost far more than we've gained.

Blog move complete

The best of the content from my former homeschooling blog is now here.

I had completely stopped doing any homeschool-related blogging because I didn't want to be on homeschoolblogger any more but I just hadn't had time to make the change. I'm looking forward to more homeschool blogging.

Unschooling and being a Christian

Originally posted Feb 2006

Just before my unplanned hiatus I received an email from a homeschool mom who wanted to know how I could square being an unschooler with being a Christian. This isn't the first time I've heard someone question whether the two are compatible, but it is the first time I've tried to come up with an answer.

So what does it mean to be a Christian parent? The simplest way for me to answer is to turn to the Table of Duties in my copy of Luther's Small Catechism. There I find these words:

Ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Eph. 6, 4.

I fulfill my vocation as a Christian mother in many ways, including but not limited to having our children baptised, regularly attending services, and doing catechesis together. Part of our vocation as parents--whether or not we are Christians--is to see to the education of our children. We have chosen to homeschool, and, in the course of our homeschool journey, to unschool.

I think that some people equate unschooling with having no discipline. They assume that unschooled children are allowed to do as they please in all areas of life. There very likely are unschooling families where this is true. However, I have a number of unschoolers among my acquaintances who--like us--require quite a bit from our kids and are unquestionably in charge.

Our unschooling does color the way we live our lives. My children have a great deal of autonomy in choosing what they will read and how they will spend their time. We don't have set times for "english" or "social studies." But there are things that they have to do. They have to bathe & brush teeth daily. They have to do their chores without me nagging. This includes dishes, laundry, bedrooms, their bathroom, and cat care.

They have to take part in family catechesis and attend all church services. (As yet, no one has complained about this.) If they make commitments--to a team, choir, job, etc.--they have to fulfill it.

If I ever see that unschooling is not working for one of my kids, we will do something else. Because I *am* ultimately in charge. Unschooling was my decision not theirs.

So, yes, the short answer is I do think it is compatible with being a Christian.