So back to the topic of my last post, kind of.
I needed to address the email that asked me "how, as an unschooler, I made
sure that my kids learned everything they were supposed to learn."
The answer, while multi-faceted, is simple.
I didn't.
Oh, I worried about it. I had folders of scope and sequences, lists of must-read books, and pages of state standards. Every once in a while I would panic and consider ordering a school-in-a-box so that my kids would know what they were supposed to know.
Then, over time, I became more secure in the knowledge that while they may not know what some educrat deemed that they should know, they would most certainly know what they needed to know. And if they didn't they would know how to find it out. And that they were learning so many things that were beyond the scope and sequences or beyond the wildest dreams of the standards writers. (I've gotta admit, sending that first unschooled kid to college, on a full merit scholarship, and watching her excel academically did a lot to boost the confidence for the rest of the journey!)
Yes. There will be holes in their knowledge. But EVERYONE has those. I don't care where you went to school, how many books you've read, or how many degrees you have, there is something that I know that you don't. There are things that my 17 year old knows that college grads don't. There are things that my husband the engineer knows that I have no desire to know.
There are things that they might have learned if we had followed curriculum "A." There are things that they might have learned if they'd gone to school. But there are also, undoubtedly, things that they have learned that they might not have in those situations.
Embrace the education choices you've made, whatever they are, unless they aren't working for you. If that's the case, make adjustments. But don't make changes to answer someone else's expectations. That's the way to crazy.
Showing posts with label Unschooling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Unschooling. Show all posts
Thursday, January 31, 2013
Sunday, January 27, 2013
It really was like that
Over the last several years I have found myself becoming a bit of an unschooling advocate. There have been lots of, "What did a day look like at your house?" emails and conversations on email lists. There are been young moms on the verge of how-can-I-do-all-this despair. There have been evenings with glasses of wine and questions, evenings when I found myself being quizzed by a circle of moms and wondered, "Why on earth are they asking ME?!"
(Of course, I do know why they are asking me. I have grown and almost grown kids who seem to have turned out okay. They are finding success in college and life beyond. They can use an alarm clock. They have reasonable standards of personal hygiene.)
I have often feared, when I have heard myself cited by someone else, that I didn't paint an accurate picture of our lives. That I made it sound looser than it was. Easier. Better.
It has been reassuring for me to talk to my kids about it. To hear their accounts of their childhoods. To hear them explain to others what it was like being unschooled. (Yes. In hindsight, I can admit that aside from a few panic-stricken moments, we have been pretty darn complete unschoolers.)
I wasn't exaggerating.
It has always made me nervous, this dispensing of homeschooling advice. I have always tried to emphasize--as anyone who has heard me speak formally, or heard me talk about homeschooling more than once can attest--that homeschooling, like parenting, is an individual thing. What works for each kid and each family may be different. And yet, when it comes right down to it, I do think that for many people, in many situations, unschooling is best. So when I am asked my opinion, that is the direction I tend to lead.
Unschooling has not been the whole story of our parenting and our family life, but it has shaped it. It has influenced the way I deal with my kids. It made me evaluate what was really important and taught me to value their input into those decisions. It made me look differently at the whole concept of what it means to be a success. It taught me to treat my kids as full-fledged people whose opinions about their own lives matter far sooner I would have otherwise.
It gave me lots of years to enjoy life with my kids, on our own agenda. And it really was like that.
Thursday, April 07, 2011
One more unschooling post
"Is it really possible for kids to grow up to be doctors or lawyers or brain surgeons if they do not learn in scheduled/controlled ways?"
This is a question lifted from a Facebook conversation. I decided that the answer needed to be a blog post, because it was getting too long. Besides, Facebook conversations are fleeting things, and this question is not unusual.
The short answer is yes. If that is what they want to do.
I have four kids, 14-23. When my kids were younger, I used to worry about things like this. I used to worry that they wouldn't get up to an alarm. That they wouldn't be able to function in class. (I'm not going to rehash our unschooling style in this post. There are some glimpses in the past four posts. Or here on my homeschooling blog.)
My first reassurances came in the forms of my friend Susan's kids. A few years older than my oldest, they had been unschooled and were doing well in the world of work and college. That helped. As my own kids got older, I saw them each developing interests, devouring books, getting out of bed early on cold mornings for choirs, classes, and other commitments.
When Bethany could see the SAT looming, she buckled down and did two years of math in a few months. She got awesome SAT scores and a full academic scholarship. She went to classes, worked hard, had a part-time job, sang in a couple of choirs, taught piano, and graduated with a 3.98 GPA with a major in history and a minor in English. This is a girl who was unschooled from fourth grade on. She devoured books, played with her brothers, watched movies, and played piano. That was pretty much her life for nine years. After graduation she was debating grad school options, but really wanted a break. Because of her writing skills, the history department let her know about a paralegal job that was available, which she applied for, and got.
She could easily choose to become a lawyer. Her grades, skills, and work ethic would get her there, no problem. She's not likely to choose that path, however, because what she really wants is a nice Lutheran husband and family. :)
Oldest son, about whom you can read in my old blog posts was our second graduate. He was our reason for homeschooling. He was a delayed reader and has sensory integration issues. He is now a college freshman majoring in history, pre-law, with a 4.0 thus far.
Both of them are FAR more disciplined in their studies than I was my first time in college. I left high school having graduated 10th out of something in the vicinity of 400, with all of the requisite activities and honors. I had spent my entire school life succeeding in the system, and yet I crashed and burned fairly spectacularly in my first shot at college.
Our 16 yo--who has never known anything but unschooling--gets himself up every Sunday at 6:30 so that he can go acolyte at our early service. This has never been required of him. He chooses it. He sings with the Bach Collegium, just finished 10 weeks rehearsing for 3-4 hours a night and performing Joseph with the Fort Wayne Civic Theater, and this week winds up 12 weeks rehearsing for The Sound of Music with a local high school. He will graduate from high school knowing as much or more Biblical Greek as students at the seminary, and because we haven't been hung up on a school schedule he has attended many theological conferences with our pastor or at our church. Next year as a senior he plans to take a college class or two, just to get used to it and because they can also count on his high school transcript. He plans to become a pastor.
Our 14 yo may just become a doctor. Or he may be an entrepreneur. Or a professor. He really isn't sure yet. He had no interest in anything even resembling academics until he was 12. He didn't even like to read. The rest of my kids have been readers, so that worried me. I needn't have worried. He reads like crazy now and doesn't like to leave the house without a book, his Latin or his Greek, and his algebra. He probably spent more hours watching musicals and playing with legos than any child in history. He will probably start college classes his junior or senior year of high school, but that will be up to him.
I have normal kids. They are all definitely smart, but they aren't prodigies. They are just as stubborn and lazy as any kids on the planet. They did spend most of their childhoods doing pretty much what they wanted, except when I would make them help clean. But unschooling hasn't kept any of them from achieving anything, and I believe that it has helped them by allowing them to develop their strengths and interests and learn self-motivation.
More from the questioner: "I want my children to be driven, motivated, curious, and smart. I want them to be able to argue, debate, and win!"
You just described my kids. :) Seriously, much of that is parenting, no matter how you choose to school them. I believe that unschooling is more likely to produce curious, motivated kids if that is what the kids see in their parent's lives. Our kids have been surrounded by books and ideas. Our life is often one protracted discussion. I always made an effort to make connections between things--history, literature, current events, movies--so that the kids would grow up looking for connections. The kids used to watch me talk back to the TV, arguing with the news people or questioning the commercials. Now they do it, too.
This is a question lifted from a Facebook conversation. I decided that the answer needed to be a blog post, because it was getting too long. Besides, Facebook conversations are fleeting things, and this question is not unusual.
The short answer is yes. If that is what they want to do.
I have four kids, 14-23. When my kids were younger, I used to worry about things like this. I used to worry that they wouldn't get up to an alarm. That they wouldn't be able to function in class. (I'm not going to rehash our unschooling style in this post. There are some glimpses in the past four posts. Or here on my homeschooling blog.)
My first reassurances came in the forms of my friend Susan's kids. A few years older than my oldest, they had been unschooled and were doing well in the world of work and college. That helped. As my own kids got older, I saw them each developing interests, devouring books, getting out of bed early on cold mornings for choirs, classes, and other commitments.
When Bethany could see the SAT looming, she buckled down and did two years of math in a few months. She got awesome SAT scores and a full academic scholarship. She went to classes, worked hard, had a part-time job, sang in a couple of choirs, taught piano, and graduated with a 3.98 GPA with a major in history and a minor in English. This is a girl who was unschooled from fourth grade on. She devoured books, played with her brothers, watched movies, and played piano. That was pretty much her life for nine years. After graduation she was debating grad school options, but really wanted a break. Because of her writing skills, the history department let her know about a paralegal job that was available, which she applied for, and got.
She could easily choose to become a lawyer. Her grades, skills, and work ethic would get her there, no problem. She's not likely to choose that path, however, because what she really wants is a nice Lutheran husband and family. :)
Oldest son, about whom you can read in my old blog posts was our second graduate. He was our reason for homeschooling. He was a delayed reader and has sensory integration issues. He is now a college freshman majoring in history, pre-law, with a 4.0 thus far.
Both of them are FAR more disciplined in their studies than I was my first time in college. I left high school having graduated 10th out of something in the vicinity of 400, with all of the requisite activities and honors. I had spent my entire school life succeeding in the system, and yet I crashed and burned fairly spectacularly in my first shot at college.
Our 16 yo--who has never known anything but unschooling--gets himself up every Sunday at 6:30 so that he can go acolyte at our early service. This has never been required of him. He chooses it. He sings with the Bach Collegium, just finished 10 weeks rehearsing for 3-4 hours a night and performing Joseph with the Fort Wayne Civic Theater, and this week winds up 12 weeks rehearsing for The Sound of Music with a local high school. He will graduate from high school knowing as much or more Biblical Greek as students at the seminary, and because we haven't been hung up on a school schedule he has attended many theological conferences with our pastor or at our church. Next year as a senior he plans to take a college class or two, just to get used to it and because they can also count on his high school transcript. He plans to become a pastor.
Our 14 yo may just become a doctor. Or he may be an entrepreneur. Or a professor. He really isn't sure yet. He had no interest in anything even resembling academics until he was 12. He didn't even like to read. The rest of my kids have been readers, so that worried me. I needn't have worried. He reads like crazy now and doesn't like to leave the house without a book, his Latin or his Greek, and his algebra. He probably spent more hours watching musicals and playing with legos than any child in history. He will probably start college classes his junior or senior year of high school, but that will be up to him.
I have normal kids. They are all definitely smart, but they aren't prodigies. They are just as stubborn and lazy as any kids on the planet. They did spend most of their childhoods doing pretty much what they wanted, except when I would make them help clean. But unschooling hasn't kept any of them from achieving anything, and I believe that it has helped them by allowing them to develop their strengths and interests and learn self-motivation.
More from the questioner: "I want my children to be driven, motivated, curious, and smart. I want them to be able to argue, debate, and win!"
You just described my kids. :) Seriously, much of that is parenting, no matter how you choose to school them. I believe that unschooling is more likely to produce curious, motivated kids if that is what the kids see in their parent's lives. Our kids have been surrounded by books and ideas. Our life is often one protracted discussion. I always made an effort to make connections between things--history, literature, current events, movies--so that the kids would grow up looking for connections. The kids used to watch me talk back to the TV, arguing with the news people or questioning the commercials. Now they do it, too.
Style
One of the ideas that Gatto mentioned that has really tickled my brain is that of "style." It was in the context of communication ability and how connections and associations provide opportunities.
He talked about how freedom and play lead to the development of individual style, and that a distinctive style is priceless. My immediate reaction was to think about my oldest son, not to the exclusion of the others, but because he has such a strong personal style. My thoughts then wandered through each of my own children and on to some of those of my friends. They each have it. They each have a uniqueness of expression that comes out in myriad ways: speech, writing, dress, interests, hobbies, musical preferences, college and career choices, and more. They are all comfortable in their own skins.
What a gift! I don't think I achieved any level of comfort in my skin, any real personal style, until I was in my mid-30's. My daughter's writing as a college freshmen showed an ease of expression that all of my fevered attempts couldn't achieve. My 16 year old wears a hat--not a baseball cap--and wears it with panache and proper etiquette, because it brings him joy.
Because part of my eldest son's personal style is a level of good manners seldom seen in most adult men today, he makes friends everywhere he goes. And it has rubbed off on his brothers--another post is coming...--which has helped them to make connections of many sorts, all of which enrich their lives in some way.
School squelches style. That's part of its job. You see it in the appearance of the girls going into freshman composition classes on a college campus: droves of straightened bleached hair, make up, tight jeans, tight t-shirts, flip-flops, slouched shoulders and a shuffling flip-flop walk. You hear it in the conversations. Those who dare maintain their own style in high school are usually the outcasts of one sort or another.
I loved Gatto's idea that style comes from play. I see it. In each of my kids I see echoes of their amusements in their personal styles. I see echoes of the world of Dyger, created by them when they were littles. I see and hear the influences of Jane Austen, Tolkein, and Dr. Seuss. I notice echoes of Darkwing Duck, Barbies & Legos, and the Zoombinis. I see Haydn and Beethoven and Clementi and Rush and Boston and Joseph's Dreamcoat and Les Miserables. And in their movements I see hours of soccer.
It makes me glad that my kids have had lots of freedom. And that's another post.
He talked about how freedom and play lead to the development of individual style, and that a distinctive style is priceless. My immediate reaction was to think about my oldest son, not to the exclusion of the others, but because he has such a strong personal style. My thoughts then wandered through each of my own children and on to some of those of my friends. They each have it. They each have a uniqueness of expression that comes out in myriad ways: speech, writing, dress, interests, hobbies, musical preferences, college and career choices, and more. They are all comfortable in their own skins.
What a gift! I don't think I achieved any level of comfort in my skin, any real personal style, until I was in my mid-30's. My daughter's writing as a college freshmen showed an ease of expression that all of my fevered attempts couldn't achieve. My 16 year old wears a hat--not a baseball cap--and wears it with panache and proper etiquette, because it brings him joy.
Because part of my eldest son's personal style is a level of good manners seldom seen in most adult men today, he makes friends everywhere he goes. And it has rubbed off on his brothers--another post is coming...--which has helped them to make connections of many sorts, all of which enrich their lives in some way.
School squelches style. That's part of its job. You see it in the appearance of the girls going into freshman composition classes on a college campus: droves of straightened bleached hair, make up, tight jeans, tight t-shirts, flip-flops, slouched shoulders and a shuffling flip-flop walk. You hear it in the conversations. Those who dare maintain their own style in high school are usually the outcasts of one sort or another.
I loved Gatto's idea that style comes from play. I see it. In each of my kids I see echoes of their amusements in their personal styles. I see echoes of the world of Dyger, created by them when they were littles. I see and hear the influences of Jane Austen, Tolkein, and Dr. Seuss. I notice echoes of Darkwing Duck, Barbies & Legos, and the Zoombinis. I see Haydn and Beethoven and Clementi and Rush and Boston and Joseph's Dreamcoat and Les Miserables. And in their movements I see hours of soccer.
It makes me glad that my kids have had lots of freedom. And that's another post.
Why unschooling?
I had a new experience on Friday. After 14 years of homeschooling, and 12 as a committed unschooler--the first two were spent trying to figure out what we were doing--I was in a situation where being an unschooler was applauded. Wow. John Taylor Gatto, former New York Teacher of the Year, was applauding unschooling parents.
That felt good.
I've spent years feeling like I needed to defend what I was doing with my kids. Even as our results have proved that unschooling works, I have experienced a doubling-down of criticism, especially from other homeschoolers. I've never asked for atta-girls, or pats on the back; so I was stunned by how nice it was to get that unsolicited affirmation.
Gatto said some other things that really resonated with me:
We live with "a palette of unexamined assumptions" including the idea that "lurking behind anything worthwhile is standardized tests, GPAs and college." These assumptions have "allowed us to become our own jailers." Wow, again. This is so true, and echoes many of the conversations that I've had in the past few years with people who think about education. Gatto pointed out that it is still true that many highly successful people--names everyone knows: Gates, Jobs, Dell, to name but a few--didn't go to college or dropped out.
We have come to value credentials over learning, and hoop-jumping over knowledge and understanding. And it is imprisoning millions in a cycle of under-achieving when they don't measure up and student loan debt when they do.
The way to break out: "There has to be a substantial amount of your educational program that only fits you." This is the key to unschooling. It is absolutely personalized. And it cannot be done in institutional school. It is not what institutional schooling is for. That has a different purpose.
This doesn't preclude college. In fact, so far both of my unschooled high school graduates have chosen to attend college, because it fits them. Both have chosen to be history majors, one added a minor in English, the other is considering German and political science as possible minors. But that is another post.
I think Gatto's quote also challenges us to consider what is "worthwhile." Our society seems to consider only material or career success as worthy of pursuit. I would argue that there are other pursuits equally worthwhile, which do not depend on tests and GPAs. Parenting, growing food, and working with the hands come to mind, as a beginning.
That felt good.
I've spent years feeling like I needed to defend what I was doing with my kids. Even as our results have proved that unschooling works, I have experienced a doubling-down of criticism, especially from other homeschoolers. I've never asked for atta-girls, or pats on the back; so I was stunned by how nice it was to get that unsolicited affirmation.
Gatto said some other things that really resonated with me:
We live with "a palette of unexamined assumptions" including the idea that "lurking behind anything worthwhile is standardized tests, GPAs and college." These assumptions have "allowed us to become our own jailers." Wow, again. This is so true, and echoes many of the conversations that I've had in the past few years with people who think about education. Gatto pointed out that it is still true that many highly successful people--names everyone knows: Gates, Jobs, Dell, to name but a few--didn't go to college or dropped out.
We have come to value credentials over learning, and hoop-jumping over knowledge and understanding. And it is imprisoning millions in a cycle of under-achieving when they don't measure up and student loan debt when they do.
The way to break out: "There has to be a substantial amount of your educational program that only fits you." This is the key to unschooling. It is absolutely personalized. And it cannot be done in institutional school. It is not what institutional schooling is for. That has a different purpose.
This doesn't preclude college. In fact, so far both of my unschooled high school graduates have chosen to attend college, because it fits them. Both have chosen to be history majors, one added a minor in English, the other is considering German and political science as possible minors. But that is another post.
I think Gatto's quote also challenges us to consider what is "worthwhile." Our society seems to consider only material or career success as worthy of pursuit. I would argue that there are other pursuits equally worthwhile, which do not depend on tests and GPAs. Parenting, growing food, and working with the hands come to mind, as a beginning.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Why not post this here while I'm at it
I have received several requests over the years for a list of must-read books on homeschooling. Last week a friend suggested that this would make a great blog post. So here it is. There may be some newer books that are missing. Since we've been at this for fourteen years, some of these may not be the most current books. I'm sure there are other worthwhile books that I haven't seen, but each of these is a gem.
You'll notice that many of these books tend toward learning theory and the unschooly. Well, that's me. I would argue that it would be good for anyone, homeschooler or not, to read the Gatto books. And any parent would be well-served by reading the Moores, John Holt, and Cindy Tobias.
Better Late Than Early by Raymond and Dorothy Moore
This is a book that I wish every parent and teacher of young children would read. I read this as the stressed out mother of a non-reading seven year old and it probably saved my sons academic life and my sanity.
The Teenage Liberation Handbook by Grace Llewellyn
This book isn't perfect, but as a homeschooling mom it really helped me to free myself from some of the school baggage I was carrying, and to free my children in turn.
Dumbing Us Down by John Taylor Gatto
Weapon's of Mass Instruction by John Taylor Gatto
I consider these the "why to" books of homeschooling. Dumbing Us Down helped to bolster my flagging courage early on by reminding me that what my kids were missing wasn't all that great. These books are especially helpful when you are having to deal with critical and skeptical family members or if you--like me--spend lots of time asking yourself if you are ruining your kids' lives.
How Children Learn
How Children Fail
Learning All the Time all by Jon Holt (You can find all three on this page.)
I didn't always agree with Holt, but overall found his writing about learning to make so much sense.
The Unschooling Handbook by Mary Griffith
The closest thing to a how-to book on this list. So many people want to know HOW to unschool. Mary Griffith gives lots of ideas and helps to paint some pictures of what unschooling looks like.
The Way They Learn
Every Child Can Succeed by Cynthia Ulrich Tobias
Both of these books are easy, quick, straight forward looks at learning styles and how to work with your child's strengths.
Homeschooling: A Family's Journey by Martine & Gregory Millman
This is the story of one family's homeschooling journey. Here is the review I wrote when I read it.
This is not an exhaustive list. I have enjoyed other homeschooling books over the years, but these are those that I believe are the most important and have contributed the most to our success and enjoyment of this journey. What are some of your favorites?
You'll notice that many of these books tend toward learning theory and the unschooly. Well, that's me. I would argue that it would be good for anyone, homeschooler or not, to read the Gatto books. And any parent would be well-served by reading the Moores, John Holt, and Cindy Tobias.
Better Late Than Early by Raymond and Dorothy Moore
This is a book that I wish every parent and teacher of young children would read. I read this as the stressed out mother of a non-reading seven year old and it probably saved my sons academic life and my sanity.
The Teenage Liberation Handbook by Grace Llewellyn
This book isn't perfect, but as a homeschooling mom it really helped me to free myself from some of the school baggage I was carrying, and to free my children in turn.
Dumbing Us Down by John Taylor Gatto
Weapon's of Mass Instruction by John Taylor Gatto
I consider these the "why to" books of homeschooling. Dumbing Us Down helped to bolster my flagging courage early on by reminding me that what my kids were missing wasn't all that great. These books are especially helpful when you are having to deal with critical and skeptical family members or if you--like me--spend lots of time asking yourself if you are ruining your kids' lives.
How Children Learn
How Children Fail
Learning All the Time all by Jon Holt (You can find all three on this page.)
I didn't always agree with Holt, but overall found his writing about learning to make so much sense.
The Unschooling Handbook by Mary Griffith
The closest thing to a how-to book on this list. So many people want to know HOW to unschool. Mary Griffith gives lots of ideas and helps to paint some pictures of what unschooling looks like.
The Way They Learn
Every Child Can Succeed by Cynthia Ulrich Tobias
Both of these books are easy, quick, straight forward looks at learning styles and how to work with your child's strengths.
Homeschooling: A Family's Journey by Martine & Gregory Millman
This is the story of one family's homeschooling journey. Here is the review I wrote when I read it.
This is not an exhaustive list. I have enjoyed other homeschooling books over the years, but these are those that I believe are the most important and have contributed the most to our success and enjoyment of this journey. What are some of your favorites?
Thursday, February 14, 2008
How did I miss this one?
Today as I was checking out some of the blogs in the Homeschooling Blogroll in my sidebar, I came across one that referred to strewing and linked to this site.
I am not surprised that there is a name for this, or that Sandra coined it. (Sometime I'll have to write a post about Sandra and the HUGE impact that this person I've never met had on my kids.)
I am surprised that in the last twelve years I never heard it before.
It's such a perfect word for something we've always done, sometimes consciously, but even more often unconsciously. I'll be cleaning and come across a book that I know one of the younger ones is ready for. Lay it on the kitchen table. Almost invariably it will at least be looked at.
This is part of the reason my kids didn't have game boys and we don't have a dvd player in our car. The drive to wherever we may be going has things to be seen. There is always something to be learned. And the conversation has always been the biggest part of the learning.
I have a couple of friends who are pretty structured and have young kids who are having some difficulties in getting them interested in "school." Maybe some strewing would be just the ticket. It can be a great way to pique their interest, or possibly help them find an interest. (Of course, as parents we have to be ready and willing to help them follow those interests, even if they don't match up with the chosen curriculum.)
So I've added a new word to my homeschool vocabulary. What fun!
I am not surprised that there is a name for this, or that Sandra coined it. (Sometime I'll have to write a post about Sandra and the HUGE impact that this person I've never met had on my kids.)
I am surprised that in the last twelve years I never heard it before.
It's such a perfect word for something we've always done, sometimes consciously, but even more often unconsciously. I'll be cleaning and come across a book that I know one of the younger ones is ready for. Lay it on the kitchen table. Almost invariably it will at least be looked at.
This is part of the reason my kids didn't have game boys and we don't have a dvd player in our car. The drive to wherever we may be going has things to be seen. There is always something to be learned. And the conversation has always been the biggest part of the learning.
I have a couple of friends who are pretty structured and have young kids who are having some difficulties in getting them interested in "school." Maybe some strewing would be just the ticket. It can be a great way to pique their interest, or possibly help them find an interest. (Of course, as parents we have to be ready and willing to help them follow those interests, even if they don't match up with the chosen curriculum.)
So I've added a new word to my homeschool vocabulary. What fun!
Monday, February 11, 2008
Christian unschooling?
I was out tooling around in the blogosphere, looking at some of the homeschool blogs outside of my usual rambles. I found a post that Dana at Principled Discovery had made a couple of days ago about Christian Education and Unschooling. Both her post and the comments were very interesting.
As you know, I think that unschooling is perfectly compatible with Christian parenting. Christian education as a distinct entity is not something that I generally think about. Our churches have always had a Board of Christian Education that oversees the Sunday School, VBS, and day school where such existed. I know that isn't what they mean.
The sense I get is that many of them believe that there is a distinctly Christian way to educate. I don't.
I don't think of what we do as Christian education. In fact, I don't think of it in terms of education all that often. I think in terms of learning, certainly. But not education or teaching.
The one difficulty that I have with the underpinnings of the philosophy of unschooling is that it assumes innate goodness of children. I, of course, believe that my children were born sinful, as we all were, but I don't think that that has to keep us from enjoying the benefits of unschooling and the lifestyle that we enjoy.
As you know, I think that unschooling is perfectly compatible with Christian parenting. Christian education as a distinct entity is not something that I generally think about. Our churches have always had a Board of Christian Education that oversees the Sunday School, VBS, and day school where such existed. I know that isn't what they mean.
The sense I get is that many of them believe that there is a distinctly Christian way to educate. I don't.
I don't think of what we do as Christian education. In fact, I don't think of it in terms of education all that often. I think in terms of learning, certainly. But not education or teaching.
The one difficulty that I have with the underpinnings of the philosophy of unschooling is that it assumes innate goodness of children. I, of course, believe that my children were born sinful, as we all were, but I don't think that that has to keep us from enjoying the benefits of unschooling and the lifestyle that we enjoy.
Thursday, February 07, 2008
Still unschooling
I don't give unschooling much thought. It's just what we do. But lately I've had several new homeschoolers asking me about it. I've had a couple of longer term homeschoolers who are to one extent or another relaxed ask me how we do a transcript. So it's been on my mind.
I keep feeling like we aren't really unschooling anymore, but it's really just that our unschooling has changed over the years. In the early years, it truly was all fun and games. Our life was very unstructured and we spent lots of time doing things like going to the forest preserve, playing games, and just messing around.
It isn't like that anymore. There's a lot more structure. The kids are taking classes. As each of them gets older and college looms, they have all started to think about their goals and what they want to do. This leads to deciding to zoom through chapters of math in a few days, tackling different subjects in science, and working on things like accounting and foreign languages.
But we're still unschooling. This is what they want to do. I'm helping them, but they are calling the shots. That's why there are still days--like today--when they serve at a funeral, watch some news, play a computer game, and read a bit. There are days like Tuesday when they played Bionicles, played a computer game, and read. But there are also days like Monday,when they went to Greek, did pages of math, and wrote reports on the Boxer Rebellion and Chinese Dynasties for history.
So it's different, but we're still doing it, and it still works.
I keep feeling like we aren't really unschooling anymore, but it's really just that our unschooling has changed over the years. In the early years, it truly was all fun and games. Our life was very unstructured and we spent lots of time doing things like going to the forest preserve, playing games, and just messing around.
It isn't like that anymore. There's a lot more structure. The kids are taking classes. As each of them gets older and college looms, they have all started to think about their goals and what they want to do. This leads to deciding to zoom through chapters of math in a few days, tackling different subjects in science, and working on things like accounting and foreign languages.
But we're still unschooling. This is what they want to do. I'm helping them, but they are calling the shots. That's why there are still days--like today--when they serve at a funeral, watch some news, play a computer game, and read a bit. There are days like Tuesday when they played Bionicles, played a computer game, and read. But there are also days like Monday,when they went to Greek, did pages of math, and wrote reports on the Boxer Rebellion and Chinese Dynasties for history.
So it's different, but we're still doing it, and it still works.
Friday, February 01, 2008
It causes me pain
It truly does. Each Wednesday when I teach my class and I assign questions for them to answer, every unschooly fiber of my being rebels.
If I had my choice I would just let them knit, play with Bionicles, and do mock Mythbusters experiments the whole time. Each week the ""class time gets shorter. Each week the kids come armed with more of what they're interested in to share with each other.
I don't force "homework" on any of the kids. Some of them LOVE to research and find the answers. Some print out a Wikipedia article that they can barely read. Some never remember to find the answers.
I've had a couple of people ask me how *I* ended up teaching a class. I am doing it because we are trying to create a homeschool resource center for homeschoolers to use as they wish, and one thing a lot of them ask for is the opportunity for the kids to take some classes. And since I'm trying to help get this going, I'm teaching. Since I'm teaching, it's history.
So we'll continue. We have a couple more months to go. The kids are having a good time. My boys wouldn't miss it for anything.
I'm the only one having any trouble.
If I had my choice I would just let them knit, play with Bionicles, and do mock Mythbusters experiments the whole time. Each week the ""class time gets shorter. Each week the kids come armed with more of what they're interested in to share with each other.
I don't force "homework" on any of the kids. Some of them LOVE to research and find the answers. Some print out a Wikipedia article that they can barely read. Some never remember to find the answers.
I've had a couple of people ask me how *I* ended up teaching a class. I am doing it because we are trying to create a homeschool resource center for homeschoolers to use as they wish, and one thing a lot of them ask for is the opportunity for the kids to take some classes. And since I'm trying to help get this going, I'm teaching. Since I'm teaching, it's history.
So we'll continue. We have a couple more months to go. The kids are having a good time. My boys wouldn't miss it for anything.
I'm the only one having any trouble.
Monday, September 17, 2007
The good life
This is one of the weeks each year when I feel particularly joyful about homeschooling. The weather is fabulous. It is perfect for riding bikes, playing basketball, doing some planting and planning for next year, going to a park, picking apples, and just being alive.
That's what my kids are doing this week.
The rest of the neighborhood kids are taking the ISTEPs. The ISTEPs are Indiana's standardized test given in the fall to test what was learned the year before. It is a week of testing that holds way too much power over the fates of individual schools.
Many teachers see problems with the ISTEPs. They test the past year's learning, so the first weeks of school are review. Many schools spend tons of time teaching to the test. They are expensive and time-consuming. They are one of the many ways that good teachers are boxed in and controlled.
And our kids don't have to take them.
Instead today they went to Greek. In the car we talked about world politics and economics and Greenspan's new book. When we got home they did a spontaneous recitation/reenactment of a childhood favorite book, Where the Wild Things Are. After lunch they'll go outside. Heavy time in the books can come on the cold rainy days that are coming.
For now I'm going to grab my boys and head to the park.
That's what my kids are doing this week.
The rest of the neighborhood kids are taking the ISTEPs. The ISTEPs are Indiana's standardized test given in the fall to test what was learned the year before. It is a week of testing that holds way too much power over the fates of individual schools.
Many teachers see problems with the ISTEPs. They test the past year's learning, so the first weeks of school are review. Many schools spend tons of time teaching to the test. They are expensive and time-consuming. They are one of the many ways that good teachers are boxed in and controlled.
And our kids don't have to take them.
Instead today they went to Greek. In the car we talked about world politics and economics and Greenspan's new book. When we got home they did a spontaneous recitation/reenactment of a childhood favorite book, Where the Wild Things Are. After lunch they'll go outside. Heavy time in the books can come on the cold rainy days that are coming.
For now I'm going to grab my boys and head to the park.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Why I can never claim to be a pure unschooler
Some of you will be disappointed in me today. Others may think that I'm just starting to get a clue. And still others will recognize that homeschooling can be a very fluid thing, always adjusting to what is needed at the time.
Today is a bit of a cranky mom day. Choir started today, so Jonathan and Andrew have to be at a school 20 minutes away at 7:25. I hate 7:25! My rule is that if I am going to get up and take them to choir they have to remain awake for the rest of the day. Evil, I know. But I need to have some sort of waking and sleeping routine, so they're going to have to adjust to an earlier bedtime.
I decided that math would be a good way to keep them awake. So I decreed a math day. Everyone has to do math. How much? As much as I say. Arbitrary, yes, but it keeps them awake.
Why math? Because I don't like math. It is difficult to learn math without studying it. If I were a pure unschooler I'd say something like, "That's okay. They'll learn it when they want and need to." And truthfully, I know they probably would. Given the choice I'd have skipped math altogether, and Bethany probably would have, too. But the SAT doesn't care if we don't like it, and high SAT scores can lead to scholarships. So they have to do math.
Today is a bit of a cranky mom day. Choir started today, so Jonathan and Andrew have to be at a school 20 minutes away at 7:25. I hate 7:25! My rule is that if I am going to get up and take them to choir they have to remain awake for the rest of the day. Evil, I know. But I need to have some sort of waking and sleeping routine, so they're going to have to adjust to an earlier bedtime.
I decided that math would be a good way to keep them awake. So I decreed a math day. Everyone has to do math. How much? As much as I say. Arbitrary, yes, but it keeps them awake.
Why math? Because I don't like math. It is difficult to learn math without studying it. If I were a pure unschooler I'd say something like, "That's okay. They'll learn it when they want and need to." And truthfully, I know they probably would. Given the choice I'd have skipped math altogether, and Bethany probably would have, too. But the SAT doesn't care if we don't like it, and high SAT scores can lead to scholarships. So they have to do math.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Explaining learning
People understand school. They understand "education." They understand teaching. But what I've come to realize is that very few people understand learning.
They have a hard time grasping the absorption and growth of knowledge and understanding absent coercion or the assistance of an outside expert.
I was trying to explain to someone yesterday that, yes, my kids have learned to spell from reading. My daughter--who is an excellent writer--learned that craft by reading excellent writers.
We don't go "back to school" and that confuses people. I try to explain that they never stop learning, but that seems to confuse people, too.
When people find out that I was an education major, but changed my major after my practicum because I realized I would hate classroom teaching, they always suggest that it's ironic that I am a teacher now. But I'm not. I'm a parent. I actively teach my children very little. What I do do is provide them with opportunities and resources. I surround them with books and maps and music and art. I take them to parks and museums and antique stores and church and zoos and Target and beaches and coffee shops and soccer games and grandmas house. I let them weed the garden and wash the clothes and help me cook.
And we talk. All the time. We talk about the news, the book they're reading, and what the lyrics to our favorite Rush songs mean. We talk about why things are the way they are and what we can or can't do something about. We talk about moving to the country and the animals we'd have and what we'll name our dogs. We talk about what we could possibly do with all of our tomatoes and why Amish chickens taste so good and why lightening does what it does when it strikes different structures.
I don't think I could keep them from learning, except maybe by sending them to school.
They have a hard time grasping the absorption and growth of knowledge and understanding absent coercion or the assistance of an outside expert.
I was trying to explain to someone yesterday that, yes, my kids have learned to spell from reading. My daughter--who is an excellent writer--learned that craft by reading excellent writers.
We don't go "back to school" and that confuses people. I try to explain that they never stop learning, but that seems to confuse people, too.
When people find out that I was an education major, but changed my major after my practicum because I realized I would hate classroom teaching, they always suggest that it's ironic that I am a teacher now. But I'm not. I'm a parent. I actively teach my children very little. What I do do is provide them with opportunities and resources. I surround them with books and maps and music and art. I take them to parks and museums and antique stores and church and zoos and Target and beaches and coffee shops and soccer games and grandmas house. I let them weed the garden and wash the clothes and help me cook.
And we talk. All the time. We talk about the news, the book they're reading, and what the lyrics to our favorite Rush songs mean. We talk about why things are the way they are and what we can or can't do something about. We talk about moving to the country and the animals we'd have and what we'll name our dogs. We talk about what we could possibly do with all of our tomatoes and why Amish chickens taste so good and why lightening does what it does when it strikes different structures.
I don't think I could keep them from learning, except maybe by sending them to school.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
First Greek, now Latin
I am not in charge around here.
That isn't, I suppose, completely true, but my kids have always had a tremendous amount of input into what they learn. When our pastor started offering Greek for homeschoolers the boys all jumped at the opportunity. They have taken to it with varying levels of commitment and success, but have all learned quite a bit.
Now they want me to teach them Latin.
Latin.
I've always thought--theoretically--that learning Latin would be a good idea, but none of them have expressed an interest before and I, being somewhat lazy, didn't ever encourage the idea.
But they want Latin, so Latin they shall have. Now I just have to figure out how.
Friday, April 13, 2007
Textbooks, teachers, and unschooling
Things have been really busy the past couple of months and the IndianaHomeschoolers list has taken most of the time and energy that I have for writing about homeschooling. Mostly it has been rather mundane hand holding and question answering for newish homeschoolers.
I enjoy it when subjects come up that I can really sink my teeth into. Unschooling is usually good for that. Today someone on the list said that unschooling was using real world learning and that unschoolers don't use textbooks.
I can quite confidently state that unschoolers--in fact lots of them--use textbooks. My unschooled-until-college daughter had textbooks for algebra and geometry because she felt that she needed to study them for college admission and a textbook is the simplest way to do that. We have loads of textbooks in our house. The big difference between us and more structured homeschoolers is that the textbooks are treated more as resources. They are here to use if someone wants them.
Every once in a while I find myself starting to doubt our unschooling. It will seem that the boys are just spending too much time being boys. These are the times that I will "suggest" that they work on some particular thing. It never fails that instead one of them blows me away with something that he is learning pursuing his own agenda. We're better off when I stay out of the way.
The other supposed unschooling no-no is teachers. We like teachers. We have used piano teachers, spanish teachers and voice teachers. The boys take Greek and our pastor is the teacher. Unschoolers can use teachers and still be unschoolers if they are pursuing something that the child wants to learn.
(I almost lost my unschooler cred when it comes to Greek. Our youngest wasn't too keen on it after he started. You see, it was hard. But I had told them all that if I bought them the books they were finishing the class. He chose to have me buy the book. So he was in. Now he likes it.)
And really, truly, I don't care if anyone thinks I'm an unschooler or not. I am sure that there are radical unschoolers who would call what I do by a different name. But there are also those school-in-a-box folks who find my way of doing things worrisome. So I'll just keep on doing what works for us, which is at least pretty darn close to unschooling.
I enjoy it when subjects come up that I can really sink my teeth into. Unschooling is usually good for that. Today someone on the list said that unschooling was using real world learning and that unschoolers don't use textbooks.
I can quite confidently state that unschoolers--in fact lots of them--use textbooks. My unschooled-until-college daughter had textbooks for algebra and geometry because she felt that she needed to study them for college admission and a textbook is the simplest way to do that. We have loads of textbooks in our house. The big difference between us and more structured homeschoolers is that the textbooks are treated more as resources. They are here to use if someone wants them.
Every once in a while I find myself starting to doubt our unschooling. It will seem that the boys are just spending too much time being boys. These are the times that I will "suggest" that they work on some particular thing. It never fails that instead one of them blows me away with something that he is learning pursuing his own agenda. We're better off when I stay out of the way.
The other supposed unschooling no-no is teachers. We like teachers. We have used piano teachers, spanish teachers and voice teachers. The boys take Greek and our pastor is the teacher. Unschoolers can use teachers and still be unschoolers if they are pursuing something that the child wants to learn.
(I almost lost my unschooler cred when it comes to Greek. Our youngest wasn't too keen on it after he started. You see, it was hard. But I had told them all that if I bought them the books they were finishing the class. He chose to have me buy the book. So he was in. Now he likes it.)
And really, truly, I don't care if anyone thinks I'm an unschooler or not. I am sure that there are radical unschoolers who would call what I do by a different name. But there are also those school-in-a-box folks who find my way of doing things worrisome. So I'll just keep on doing what works for us, which is at least pretty darn close to unschooling.
Thursday, February 22, 2007
All the knowledge in the world
Last week as I spent a couple of hours just browsing the shelves in our new library, I was again overwhelmed by the vast amount that there is to know. I was caught between elation and discouragement, elated by the certain knowledge that I will never run out of books to read and yet discouraged that I will never run out, because this means that I will never know or understand all of the things that I could wish.
As homeschooling parents we often fear that our kids are not learning "everything." Of course they aren't. What we really fear is that there is some essential bit of knowledge that they haven't learned, and that this puts their futures are in jeopardy.
No one learns everything. Some people have an amazing, borderline-encyclopedic knowledge of a great many things. Many people don't care to have more information than they need to function in their daily lives.
There may be some essential bit that your child doesn't have. But that's okay. When he needs it, he can learn it. Think about the knowledge that you use in your daily activities. Did you learn it in school? I spend a lot of my day on the computer. I run email lists and blog. I have built more than one website. I upload, download, bank, shop, sell, balance financial accounts, create spreadsheets, brochures, and fliers, and can put together a mean Power Point presentation. All of this in spite of the fact that I never used a computer until I was a 28-year-old college graduate and mother of two and needed it for my job. I have learned the information that I have needed as I have needed it.
Yesterday my boys were talking and I was amazed at their knowledge of mythology. They made me feel really uninformed so I've added a some mythology to my reading pile. A relative was questioning the wisdom of them learning Greek. Why not choose something more practical? But knowledge doesn't all need to be practical. The value of knowledge can come from the discipline achieved in the learning or from the sheer joy of knowing something. It can come in the interesting late night conversations with friends or the essay exam for a history class that blows a professor away.
Best of all, for me, it can come from sitting at breakfast, with a child who is so excited by what he is reading that his pancakes are growing cold.
As homeschooling parents we often fear that our kids are not learning "everything." Of course they aren't. What we really fear is that there is some essential bit of knowledge that they haven't learned, and that this puts their futures are in jeopardy.
No one learns everything. Some people have an amazing, borderline-encyclopedic knowledge of a great many things. Many people don't care to have more information than they need to function in their daily lives.
There may be some essential bit that your child doesn't have. But that's okay. When he needs it, he can learn it. Think about the knowledge that you use in your daily activities. Did you learn it in school? I spend a lot of my day on the computer. I run email lists and blog. I have built more than one website. I upload, download, bank, shop, sell, balance financial accounts, create spreadsheets, brochures, and fliers, and can put together a mean Power Point presentation. All of this in spite of the fact that I never used a computer until I was a 28-year-old college graduate and mother of two and needed it for my job. I have learned the information that I have needed as I have needed it.
Yesterday my boys were talking and I was amazed at their knowledge of mythology. They made me feel really uninformed so I've added a some mythology to my reading pile. A relative was questioning the wisdom of them learning Greek. Why not choose something more practical? But knowledge doesn't all need to be practical. The value of knowledge can come from the discipline achieved in the learning or from the sheer joy of knowing something. It can come in the interesting late night conversations with friends or the essay exam for a history class that blows a professor away.
Best of all, for me, it can come from sitting at breakfast, with a child who is so excited by what he is reading that his pancakes are growing cold.
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Whole lotta learnin' goin' on
We're having a good winter. All of the boys are reading great books. They're all doing their Greek, although not all with the same level of enthusiasm. The national and international news provides constant fodder for discussion and debate. Andrew has built a light box and is getting ready to start some tomato seeds for me. Watching past seasons of Gilmore Girls has led us to new authors. A little more progress could be happening in math, but we've discovered that it seems to come when it's needed. Since Patrick will be taking his SATs for the first time in the fall, I expect some intense math work to start soon.
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Unschooling, success, goals, and gaps
Every parent, unschooler or not, has goals for their children. I think that part of the distinction is which of our goals and desires are important enough that we in some way require that our children achieve them. In our home, those goals which are requirements ultimately fall more into the realm of parenting than "schooling." Church attendance in our home is not negotiable, neither were catechism classes. Fortunately, this hasn't been a problem. All of my children will leave home understanding the basics of keeping a house clean, doing laundry, cooking, balancing a checkbook, and other practical matters. These are non-negotiables, as are courtesy, honesty, and respect. If my four children grow to be responsible, reasonably happy adults who contribute to their family, church, and society according to their vocations, then that will be success.
As the mom/facilitator/committed unschooler have I snuck in some lessons because I think that there are things everyone should know? Yep. All my kids are great with maps and geography. When we take a trip they navigate. When we talk about news and world events--which is all the time at our house--it isn't unusual for someone to grab a globe or atlas, because that's what I've always done. Because of my background and our family discussions my kids tend to be very critical readers and listeners. They are always looking for the hidden agenda or story. They also love to proofread the newspaper. :)
I see a big part of my job to be exposing them to places, things, ideas, people. I surround them with books, movies, music. We don't limit TV or computer access, although there are specific shows that are not watched. We go to museums, zoos, parks, & concerts. We travel. They have opportunities to take part in music groups, sports, drama, whatever. We get out in the world and meet people. We talk LOTS.
Friday, January 05, 2007
What do unschoolers do over break?
I've gotta admit, there's been a whole lotta loafin' goin' on 'round here. The past few weeks we moved from laid back to practically comatose. We watched TV, ate Christmas cookies, played computer games, read books, and slept in.
Of course, this was all more exaggerated than usual because Mom was sick and Dad was off work for over a week. Next week things will get back to normal. The Christmas cookies are gone.
Of course, this was all more exaggerated than usual because Mom was sick and Dad was off work for over a week. Next week things will get back to normal. The Christmas cookies are gone.
Friday, November 10, 2006
Unschooling and being a Christian
Originally posted Feb 2006
Just before my unplanned hiatus I received an email from a homeschool mom who wanted to know how I could square being an unschooler with being a Christian. This isn't the first time I've heard someone question whether the two are compatible, but it is the first time I've tried to come up with an answer.
So what does it mean to be a Christian parent? The simplest way for me to answer is to turn to the Table of Duties in my copy of Luther's Small Catechism. There I find these words:
They have to take part in family catechesis and attend all church services. (As yet, no one has complained about this.) If they make commitments--to a team, choir, job, etc.--they have to fulfill it.
If I ever see that unschooling is not working for one of my kids, we will do something else. Because I *am* ultimately in charge. Unschooling was my decision not theirs.
So, yes, the short answer is I do think it is compatible with being a Christian.
Just before my unplanned hiatus I received an email from a homeschool mom who wanted to know how I could square being an unschooler with being a Christian. This isn't the first time I've heard someone question whether the two are compatible, but it is the first time I've tried to come up with an answer.
So what does it mean to be a Christian parent? The simplest way for me to answer is to turn to the Table of Duties in my copy of Luther's Small Catechism. There I find these words:
Ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Eph. 6, 4.
I fulfill my vocation as a Christian mother in many ways, including but not limited to having our children baptised, regularly attending services, and doing catechesis together. Part of our vocation as parents--whether or not we are Christians--is to see to the education of our children. We have chosen to homeschool, and, in the course of our homeschool journey, to unschool.I think that some people equate unschooling with having no discipline. They assume that unschooled children are allowed to do as they please in all areas of life. There very likely are unschooling families where this is true. However, I have a number of unschoolers among my acquaintances who--like us--require quite a bit from our kids and are unquestionably in charge.
Our unschooling does color the way we live our lives. My children have a great deal of autonomy in choosing what they will read and how they will spend their time. We don't have set times for "english" or "social studies." But there are things that they have to do. They have to bathe & brush teeth daily. They have to do their chores without me nagging. This includes dishes, laundry, bedrooms, their bathroom, and cat care.They have to take part in family catechesis and attend all church services. (As yet, no one has complained about this.) If they make commitments--to a team, choir, job, etc.--they have to fulfill it.
If I ever see that unschooling is not working for one of my kids, we will do something else. Because I *am* ultimately in charge. Unschooling was my decision not theirs.
So, yes, the short answer is I do think it is compatible with being a Christian.
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